My son brewed the best coffee I have had in a very long time. It was smoothe and hot and juuuuust right. Made me go 'mmmmmm' and smile. You know what I was feeling, don't you? Ahhhh.
Our children can bring that 'mmmmmm' smile and the ahhhh moment in other ways, like when they obey, when they share, play nice, do the right thing. We get all warm inside when they tell us they love us, when they cheerfully do what we ask, and when the teacher offers, "Your child is the best behaved child in my class. I wish they were all like her!"
Why? Simple. It is because they are extentions of us.
Children aren't pre-programmed like kittens. Kitties seem to know how a cat is to behave; kiddies on the other hand don't. (Did I hear a few "Amens!" out there?)
Children become what we train them to be. Good training results in praise from teachers and sweet temperments in both toddlers and teens. Unsatisfactory results reflect poor parenting (Not to be confused with bad parents or unloving ones.), and the result is more of an uugh moment than an ahhhh one.
How does good behavior happen? It is the critical question. The answer is simple: Like coffee, good outcomes demand knowledge and patient effort. My son's perfect coffee didn't brew itself, nor was it's lucious flavor an accident. Parent's often need some advice and an example. Debbie and Michael Pearl of www.nogreaterjoy.org helped me. Their material on rearing children is EXCELLENT and it works....just ask anyone who knows any of our 5 children.
From my own learning I'll give you 3 things to do TODAY that will help with your kids (regardless of age...3 or 33)
1. Ask each child if you have done anything to hurt them. Whatever they tell you, do NOT excuse or explain it; simply apologize and ask for forgiveness.
2. Tell them you love them. (Say the actual words...with sincerity)
3. Tell them you are proud of them. (Think of a way in which you are truly proud of them and let them know how you feel.)
Even God did numbers 2 and 3! He yelled it from heaven, "This is MY son! I love him, and with him I am well pleased!" He only left off the first one, because, well... he din't need to apologize. However, You and I likely do.
Okay, sip your coffee and consider how you're going to get busy training some great kids. You'll be feeling 'mmmmmm' and 'ahhhhh' before you know it....and deep inside, you'll smile.
All material copyrighted by Stephen Meeks
--Gourmet Thoughts for A Gourmet Day ** Fresh Brewed Here Every Monday-- Millions of us begin our day with coffee. For some its a necessity; for others a simple luxury. Which ever your case, I want to share it with you occasionally--not to intrude, but, hopefully to enhance by offering a thought, an idea, an insight, or a story. After all, what better way to begin a gourmet day than with a gourmet thought and hot coffee?
